February 23rd, 2005

Long road home



"Apparently, vibrators have been around much longer than you would imagine. They were invented by doctors who were bored with men bringing their hysterical wives to them for treatment. To begin with, the doctors used to relieve the women by bringing them to climax manually, but then someone had the clever idea of inventing a machine to do the same job.

"Much less messy and healthier all round. How those men must have congratulated themselves. They didn't realize what they had unleashed.

"Monica asked me whether I remembered Jean from the sex party, and I couldn't think who she meant until she called her Cathy Come.

"Evidently, Cathy had bought some of those little balls you put up yourself at the party and decided to wear them the next time she went to the supermarket. It was fine at first, rather nice and tingly, but then the sensation got worse, and by the time she got to frozen foods, Cathy couldn't stop coming. Eventually, she had to abandon her shopping cart at the checkout and try to walk home. She'd got only about a hundred yards when she found herself clinging to a lamppost, unable to move without groaning.

"The funny thing was that no one who walked past her gave her a second look. She had become invisible."

--from The ABCs of Love, by Sarah Salway, who is my new hero. :)
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