I am not feeling very good about myself tonight. I made some mistakes I shouldn't have made in the late newscast tonight, and I'm beating myself up over it. Probably because the other director turned in two clean shows tonight; both my shows had on-air mistakes.

It's so silly, isn't it??? I mean, sometimes the other director has discreps and I have clean shows, then how must she feel? (She probably doesn't even care...)

I am a mediocre director. I must work harder to overcome that. I pride myself on being reliable in the shows, and to the producers. I want the producers to feel confident when they have to work with me. I work at making myself available to them as much as possible from the time they start to build their shows right through until the show's done airing. But still it's not enough.

I NEED MORE PRACTICE.

That's inscribed on the back wall of the Kuk Sool Won school here in Ft. Myers.

Oh well. Time to go home.