I hate to admit it, but I'm not registered to vote here. I have my reasons for that which I can't go into here. I think I'm going to take care of that before November however. Not to mention there are issues and elections that pop up every so often in Cape Coral where I live that I'd like to cast my vote on.
So last night was the Florida Primary. Hillary Clinton came out way ahead of the other Democrats who participated, while John McCain barely squeaked a win past Mitt Romney on the Republican side. As for my side of things in the news business, last night was one of the busiest nights we have in our line of work, suffice to say. I'm happy to report that last night, after 8 years in this business, I finally got one of those stupid cut-ins right, those cut-ins that dominate our night from about 7pm until the newscast at 11pm. Those have never been smooth for me, mainly because I'm very bad at doing live things that I only do once maybe twice a year.
But last night I did awesome! Not only did I nail the cut-in, but it was probably the most important cut-in of the night - it was John McCain speaking live after he was announced as the winning Republican in the Florida Primary last night. We were totally clean, I confidently called the transitions and it was so smooth you would have thought Senator McCain himself gave us a script of what he was going to do beforehand! It felt so awesome. That little cut-in last night was truly one of the finer highlights of my career.
And all our newscasts last night were clean. Both 6pm shows and both 11pm shows were clean. It felt good. We did great. We totally trumped our competition last night too, who didn't even have any graphics showing numbers last night. We speculated their election graphic system crashed and burned. Whatever, I'm just glad I was not only on the winning team last night, I was one of the key players behind the scenes that made us win so big last night.
Totally switching gears here ... so the surgery last Friday ... yeah. It went smoothly, I'm happy to say. The anesthesia which I was so terrified of turned out to be a cinch, thank goodness. I'll tell you what, they injected me with about 3 different things before the anesthesia, however. Pepcid, Reglan (for nausea) and a sedative. Actually it was the sedative that made things so much easier I think. The surgery I had was a D&E, which if you didn't know stands for "dilation and evacuation". When a woman has a miscarriage it's a nice thing. When a woman gets this procedure for an abortion it's a much more controversial matter, however this is apparently what they do when a woman has a miscarriage also, as in my case.
For me, this procedure was long, long overdue and consequently a great relief. Consider this: on Dec. 3 I was informed that the fetus inside me had no heartbeat, prepare for miscarriage. On Dec. 19 I began spotting. On Dec. 26, one week later, I had the miscarriage, with an 'aftershock' the day after that. On Dec. 28 I was turned away from my doctor's office for not having enough money to pay the bill I had incurred from previous visits. On Jan. 6 I began bleeding profusely again, with cramps and large pieces of the "products of conception" coming out of me again. On Jan. 9 I went to the ER where I spent nearly 11 hours getting examined, just to find out my diagnosis was "incomplete miscarriage". I didn't finally have the D&E until last Friday, Jan. 25, one month after the miscarriage happened, and nearly two months after I began preparing for it.
On top of all that, I just found out today that it may take another month before the bleeding finally stops, and then I have "irregular periods" to look forward to after that. And yet somehow I am looking forward to trying to get pregnant again. I'm also noticing that the profuse number of stories of women out there turning up pregnant (namely celebrities) or having their babies, is starting to get to me, because I am a long ways off from that happening to me again. It will probably be about 3 months from now before we'll be able to try again at the rate I'm going. The last time we tried was October. Yeah, it sucks.
But it could be worse. I am not complaining. It could certainly be worse. While I was pregnant I found out my husband's cousin lost her baby during birth due to a mistake made by the nurse delivering the baby (my situation is cake compared to that), and then a friend of a friend (not someone I've met yet but a girlfriend of one of Glenn's friends) had a stillborn. So yeah, it could definitely be worse!
Otherwise, I am happy about my life. Life is actually pretty good, all things considered. I love my husband, I love living in Florida, and I have many blessings to count. However, I continue to feel guilty for abandoning my mother in Ohio. I can't seem to resolve that, nor will I, until I either move back home or move her down here. The latter is unlikely to happen, and yet I can't figure out a way to break it to my husband that I need to move back home. Glenn does not want to leave Florida, and I can't say I blame him. But my mom needs us; she needs me. I need to take care of her right now. She just turned 70 last Saturday; I sent her a nice little birthday present, some books I got at the bookstore, but frankly I got the feeling that she was disappointed that I wasn't there to celebrate with her in person. I'm still kicking myself about that. Why should a 70-year-old woman who is kind-hearted and patient and tolerant and worked hard her whole life live alone caring for her 8-year-old grandson (not mine, my sister's)??? It's unjust, and I'm partly the reason she's living that way.
Yeah ... whole lot on the brain tonight.
I have a plan though; I'm going to get some producer training while I'm here, hopefully get my own shows to produce for a while, and then take that experience with me back to Toledo, so that I don't have to work in production when I move back there. It won't be perfect, but it will be a lot better than working at the 7-11.